THE DIVINE IMPULSE
A Teaching Vision
The usual group of seven of us gathered last Friday at Jai's for meditation. After we found our places and settled down on cushions in the meditation room in the basement, Jai played the harmonium and led us in some Siva and Krishna chants. That set the devotional mood wonderfully and we kept the flow going with open, spontaneous toning. This brought us into even deeper conscious resonance. A few of us continued toning to the flow of prana life-force using the buzzing brahmari breath. Empowered in this satsang gathering of kindred souls, the shakti force up and down my spine was especially clear and surging. My prayer was silent, grateful beyond words for the fullness of my life at this time and with this fellowship.
Soon, my mind was unfettered and soared. My Witnessing awareness dropped all constraints and self imposed limitations. It grew boundless, infinite. It was taken beyond mind itself to the Knowing of all as One.
From this transmental perspective, I saw the Wave of Divine Impulse, a flowing avalanche of essential Being/Consciousness. Eternally sourced in the Sacred Infinite, I saw it flowing down through the Realms of Becoming, the inanimate, material aspect of beings and things. These "bits" of the inanimate remained where they were in the space/time continuum until the Wave of Divine Impulse lifted them into being. Then, as it flowed on, all that returned back into inanimate "death".
Blissfully awoken, I Witnessed that, from the blossoming and dissolution of galaxies to the simplest fission of a cell into two, it was the passing of this Wave alone that was the true basis of the universe's coming into being and passing away.
Although all this was revealed to me through my own personal and cultural patterns and characteristics of perceiving, it remained clearly other, utterly distinct in my awareness that my universe was in a merely latent state in its inert state and raised into being only when evoked by the passing Wave.
With this as context, I was brought to the examination of my own family's dynamics. These were revealed as microscopic reflections of their subculture's mind-sets. I saw my own coming into being in the Wave's upward sweep amidst this dynamic with my own unique role and perspective, positioned with others who move in my life. An elaborate, intricate interweaving of patterns, forces and dynamics was brought to the fullness of life through the Wave Divine Intention. Then it all ended, emptied and discarded as the Wave flows on across the eternities.
Then this elaborate and, now, very personal perception expanded out and out, till it filled and detailed my Witnessing cosmos-wide, many-dimensioned Reality.
Absorbed in this awe for eternities, till, fulfilled and exhausted, the revelation waned and I returned, somewhat, back to time and place. Through my barely slit open eyes, I gazed around the single candle lit room and --Yes!-- the Divine Wave was present, alive in each one of us siting there in prayerful meditation. Considering, searching every face, I saw each one of us was awoken to their Real Self and gave the luminous revelation, "This is Spirit! Each one of us is Self manifesting in and through this unique individual form. Each is the Totality in and through ourselves, separate and unique,"
And in the alteration of this Knowing, I recognized that the only "reality" I have access or knowledge of was my own perception of Totality. What I believe is the real and objective world and beings about me is really my very personal beliefs about them, my minutely detailed fantasies.
The others in the satsang group about me, in their blissful self-absorption, disappear into this Shimmering. I flow back and forth between Knowing myself as cosmic, and realizing the Cosmos as my Self: immensely conflicting and totally complementary.